Raven's Challenge 80

It is Saturday and time to play with words supplied by Raven's Wordzzle
This Week's Ten Word Challenge will be: Charitable, alligator, tribute, drunk, slave, preparation, carrots, mountainside, propeller, lark
For the mini challenge: chisel, worship, suicide, organic, plus

The Mega Challenge as
The Ongoing Adventures of Agent 012

In tribute to his recent unbelievable attack on the very heart of Mute Agent 012 was enjoying two days off. Enjoying is not exactly the right word for it.
His wife , still upset over the neighbor’s new fence, kept dreaming up horrible things that were going on behind the fence.
“Wonder ?” she said “ If they were feeding slaves to alligators. How would we know?”
“ You would hear them screaming and all I hear is the sound of a Lark.” He replied.
“ Dad?” His youngest asked “ Why does the propeller on my beanie only turn in one direction and why doesn’t it lift me off the ground?”
“Gears and gravity” Agent 012 answered putting down the chisel he was using trying to get a brick out of the garden wall in preparation for the new brick he wanted to replace it with.
“Dad did you know that Bees were the first suicide bombers. When they sting you they die.” His older son pointed out.
And on an on it went. Inside his head he was screaming so he was happy when his wife sent him to the Mountainside Plus Market to get some organic carrots.
But on the way he was stopped by a group representing The Great Circle of Light Church trying to raise money for a new worship center. He didn’t feel the least bit charitable not even when they told him how many drunks they had saved that month. So they got nothing from him but a very large frown.
His day continued so that on the way home he was almost run over by a truck carrying a load of telephone poles to his neighbor.
Perhaps, tomorrow would be a better day.

The ten word challenge- The Greatest Hunter

Biscay Samson Loomer, or BS Loomer as he was often called, was one of the world’s greatest hunters. He had captured alligators in Florida, goats on the mountainside of Peru, and even the Rainbow Lark , world’s rarest bird. He thought then that he was the freest of men but he had since come to realize that he was a slave to the big money interests. For them he had stuck those poor animals into cages called Zoos not to protect them from extinction but so the men could sell stupid beanies with propellers on top and other junk to the people who came to stare.
It was not long after he came to this realization that he formed a charitable organization dedicated to setting animals free. The organization built a half way house for animals where they could be taken in preparation for being released back into then wild. It is a tribute to that preparation that the releases went as well as they did.
What upset people was how he got the animals to release. It was rumored but never proven that he would throw a big party and get the Zoo staff drunk then using drugged meat and carrots he put the animals to sleep and took them away. In the morning the Zoo was empty and the staff had a terrific hangover. Nobody ever saw him st the party. Nobody ever saw his trucks take the animals away. The little tracker chips they had on some of the animal just ceased to work. The animals vanished. He was after all one of the world’s greatest hunters.

The mini challenge-Obama on Mt. Rushmore

It is the year 2087 and almost all historians are in agreement that Obama was one of the five greatest presidents the country ever had. So great was his impact that after his untimely death there were those who believed he would return and started the Church of the Return where they spent time in the worship of him who changed America.
Every year true believers commit suicide on his grave which is supposed to hasten his return.
But I’m not a believer . In fact at this moment I hate the guy and his big ears. You see it’s my job to chisel his image on Mt. Rushmore. He is being added to the other four great Presidents.
At first I was really happy. To be picked was an honor plus the pay was great. That all organic stuff my wife eats doesn’t come cheap you know.
Things were going really well. It really was beginning to look like him. We had chiseled away a lot of rock when we hit that really hard stuff just below one of his big ears. I decided to use a little dynamite to remove it. Just a little, mind you, not very much.
The explosion went off and there went an ear. Obama’s big ear tumbling down the mountain. I’m ruined. There is no way to repair this. You can’t super glue back a rock ear that size.
I hate the guy.
I just hate the guy.

Of course the dragons were busy today you can see them HERE.