Saturday, August 29, 2009

Raven's Challenge 79

It is Saturday and time to play with words supplied by Raven's Wordzzle
This Week's Ten Word Challenge will be: records, impulsive, really cool, bread crumbs, angels, Sponge Bob, magical moment, back and forth, suffering, good fences make good neighbors
For the mini challenge: side effects are generally mild, clingy, rooster, samples, curiosity

The Mega Challenge as
The Ongoing Adventures of Agent 012


Agent 012 discovered, as he had suspected , that there was mix up in the school records and after some back and forth discussion with the school registrar he got his son transferred from Fashion Creation to Wood shop. His son , who had been suffering from just the thought of a semester of dress making thought it was really cool the way his dad fixed things.
His wife, however, was very upset because their new neighbor was building a fence around his property. “ Remember dear, good fences make good neighbors” he reminded her.
“But this one is ten feet high and a real eyesore” she replied.” Don’t you have any curiosity as to why such a tall fence?”
“Nah! Maybe he’s going to raise roosters or something and doesn’t want us to know. Or he could have a clingy wife that embarrasses him.” Agent 012 suggested.
“ Are you insinuating that I’m clingy “ she grouched.
He took her hand in one of those magical moments, looked her in the eye and said “ I’m not building any fences.”
Unfortunately that was when the Agency called and summoned him to the office. The worst part is he knew just what they wanted. How was Mute finding Thaw. It was as if there was a trail of bread crumbs to the safe house. On the way in the answer came to him. Being impulsive he stopped at headquarters picked up some equipment and a Doctor.
Arriving at the safe house he turned on the equipment and sure enough there was a signal coming from the room in which they were holding Thaw. Entering the room he found the signal coming from Thaw’s backside. In fact it was coming from the Sponge Bob tattoo that was just below the two angels tattoo. The Doctor was called in and asked to remove the chip surgically. He administered a local anesthesia of which he assured Thaw that the side effects are generally mild and proceeded to remove the chip.
That chip now had a number of important uses. It could be compared with samples of other chips and the maker could be determined. It could be used to lead more Mute Agents into a trap.
This has really been 012’s day.


The ten word challenge- The Fence

Robert Angels who was nicknamed Sponge Bob had decided to build a fence around his yard. After all he kept reminding himself good fences make good neighbors. He was tired of his neighbor’s beer cans and other garbage ending up in his yard. His suffering had started the first day the new neighbor moved in and had gone on for a year now. He and the neighbor had gone back and forth over the problem with the neighbor always promising to change but never keeping his promise. He was not an impulsive man and the fence was a carefully reasoned out decision. He calculated that it was cheaper to build and eight foot high fence than to take his neighbor to court and he was probably right, lawyers don’t come cheap. He had even checked at the Hall of Records to be sure he knew exactly where his property line was.
So on a really cool Fall day the fence was started. It was almost a magical moment. He felt like a bird finding an unbelievable amount of bread crumbs or a squirrel discovering enough nuts to last the winter. He saw it as a turning point in his life.

The mini challenge-Brothers

Fredrick wondered if it was legal for him to paint a rooster on his side of the fence that separated him from his neighbor. He had never liked that fence and wanted to make it less harsh to look at. Perhaps, he thought, I can get some of those big plastic clingy rooster things and stick them on the fence. Then I can pull them off the fence if he complains. His neighbor was always complaining. Prior to building the fence he had complained about beer cans and a few small things that somehow ended up rolling into his yard. Now he was complaining about the noise.
All of this had given him a real migraine headache and his Doctor had given him some samples of a new drug . It said right on the bottle that the side effects are generally mild but now he had this rash all over his body. Indeed he was suffering the pain of a thousand points of itch. He called the Doctor and asked” Doc, just in curiosity, is a whole body rash a mild side effect?”.
The Doctor said that it sounded more like Poison Ivy but he’d have to come into the office to be sure.
At this point Fredrick Angels really wanted to tell his brother Robert about his misery. But since the fence they really hadn’t talked.
This was clearly not a magic moment.

Of course the dragons were busy today you can see them HERE.

Friday, August 28, 2009

Flash Away

Flash Fiction 55
Friday 55 Flash Fiction is brought to you by G-man (Mr Knowitall). The idea is you write a story in exactly 55 words. If you want to take part pop over and let G-man know when you've posted your 55.Here is today's story:

The Flasher


He was a flasher.
There was no doubt of that
He carried the little card that said he was a flasher.
He had been a flasher since 2003.
But you can't go around flashing in polite society.
They would throw the book at him.
The police caught him in the very act of flashing
a chimney.




Since I discovered it was okay I am writing a second flash 55 which will be a continuous story but a complete story every week. Here then is the twentieth chapter in the exciting ongoing adventures of Sir Laughsalot and Robberhood
The entire story to date is HERE
The most recent chapters are HERE


Finding the incompetent Wizard Moreless Sir Laughsalot asked him to change his ugly frog back into a horse.
The wizard waved his hands and spoke some Latin words.
There was a puff of smoke.
Thus the frog became a giraffe, a very tall giraffe.
Sir Laughsalot sent his Squire for a saddle and a ladder.

Of course the dragons were busy today you can see them HERE.

Thursday, August 27, 2009

Poor Dalton

It is a Quilly day. Time to take Quilly’s three words for the day and write a story.Today we have three words from Quilly and one from the Fortress Word Vault. Click on the word for a definition: ambition; pessundate & operiment plus one other amarulence

Dalton Soakum was not a man of great ambition. He didn’t want to get filthy rich he just wanted to make what he considered a reasonable living off the buildings he owned. He didn’t feel up to having them repaired so he charged low rents. He thought of this as a nice thing to do. So a faucet didn’t work here or there and some toilets didn’t flush. So some of the heating systems barely gave heat. So a little plaster was falling down. So there were a few rats. What did they expect for the prices he charged ? Penthouses?
Everything was going well until the editor of the Daily Globe started his crusade. Now people looked at him like some sort of villain and even worse some tenants were withholding their rent until improvements were made. He could pay off building inspectors but not judges. Even some of his building inspectors had told him they might have to make a real inspection under pressure from the Globe.
His lawyers had tried to put an operiment on the articles but they had no success. If the articles continued they would pessundate his entire kingdom.
So it was with great amarulence he sat late at night working on a bomb.
If he hadn’t been such a hitonious shot the editor would be dead. Life would be mellifluous just as it was before the articles.
But after tonight there would be no Globe. Just the idea of no Globe filled his head with ebullient thoughts. There would be no paladin riding in at the last minute to save the paper. And if he was lucky the intransigent editor would be in the office when the bomb went off. The editor so deserved to die because of his opprobrious conduct toward poor Dalton. The editor’s prolix on Dalton was unforgivable. He was going to pay.
At the thought of this Dalton smashed his hand down on the table in glee.
The last thing he saw was the bomb falling toward the floor. Then Dalton and his house were no more.
Just another mystery the incompetent police chief would never solve.

&*&*&*&*&*&*&*&

And of course with Quilly's words , even watered down, comes the required quivel.
There is poetry which a few people do well.
Then there is poetic drivel which is more fun and has its own experts.
But below them all is Quivel
Remember to write quivel you must write something that looks like a poem, any style , but is so bad that if it was printed in a book of poetry a true poetic zoilist would tear it out and burn it.


Pity Poor Quilly

Our Quilly has no backbone
For when they began to groan
She put an operiment on her words
Dumbed them down for the nerds
Their amarulence scared her off
Couldn’t stand to hear them scoff
She pessundated her operation
Now hard words she has to ration
No ambition to face their whine
Gives no pearls to such swine.
Saving old words no more a goal
Gives words from cradle role.

Of course the dragons were busy today you can see them HERE.

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Idioms

A Thousand Words In Idioms

wordle

Jientje at Heaven is in Belgium, hosts A Thousand Words In Idioms.

My first try


Don’t throw the baby out with the bath water
If you get rid of useful things when discarding inessential things, you throw the baby out with the bath water.




Third rail
The third rail of something is dangerous to alter or change. Originally, the third rail is the one carrying the electricity for a train.

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

The Dream

A Picture Story from Portrait of Words




He had taken the bus from Neenah to Laona, Wisconsin just to ride a genuine steam engine. There weren’t many of those left. This one operated from a fancy station and was called the Lumberjack Special. It hauled people ten miles to a museum filled with memories of the day when logging was king.
For a long time he just stood and looked at that magnificent black beauty. He watched the smoke and listened to the sounds that only a steam engine makes.

But then the special moment came. He climbed up into the cab. Today he would drive this wonder. Today he would fulfill his dreams.
Some people dreamed of riding in rotating restaurants high in the sky. Some people dreamed of being in a submarine deep in the ocean.

He dreamed of being the engineer as the train rattled over one railroad bridge after another. It was going to be heaven.
His friend , who worked for the society that kept up this railroad had made the arrangements. In return he made a nice contribution to the society. It all worked out. He got to be the Engineer and they got to pay the bills.
Then he started the train in motion. None of the paying passengers knew they had a rank amateur at the controls. That was fine. His friend sat next to him to make sure he didn’t make any mistakes but he had prepared long and hard for this day.
As they left the station he blew the whistle. A little bunny standing by the track had heard it so many times it didn’t even jump.
Too soon they reached the old logging camp and his moment of glory was over. But he would remember it forever. He knew that as he drove the school bus, his regular job, he would pretend it was the engine all black and shiny. The kids would never know what they were riding in.

Saturday, August 22, 2009

Raven's Challenge 78

It is Saturday and time to play with words supplied by Raven's Wordzzle
This Week's Ten Word Challenge will be: blind panic, apartment, fleas, soap operas, cajun cooking, free and easy, legal, sangria, public school, new
For the mini challenge: class, calendar, keeping secrets, boring, fashion



The Mega Challenge as
The Ongoing Adventures of Agent 012

They moved Thaw to a new hideaway . This time only Agent 012 and the guards with Thaw knew which place had been chosen. Still within twelve hours the place was under attack. This time they had more firepower and blew a hole in the Kitchen wall sending the Cajun cooking flying all across the room and breaking the last bottle of sangria. The guards were taken by surprise as life in the house had been boring and they had taken to watching soap operas. Instead of resorting to blind panic they activated the mine field. They will never know if the attackers would have been any good at keeping secrets since they were blown into small pieces.
At this point Thaw began complaining that the basement apartment where they were keeping him not only had no class but had fleas.
While this was going on, Agent 012 was checking his calendar. He had a meeting scheduled with the public school . They had scheduled his oldest son for a class in fashion clothes making which had to be a mistake. He should be in wood shop this year. He wasn’t buying any of this free and easy, new age stuff where boys did girl things. He was checking with the legal department to be sure he could fight it.
When he heard about the latest attack he was flabbergasted. How was Mute getting the information. He sure didn’t tell them and he was the only one who knew.
This was not going to be his day.

The ten word challenge- Recipe Thief
Charlie Sangria was in a blind panic after finding out that somebody else had submitted the same Cajun cooking recipe right down to his new and secret ingredients. It was even worse because they had submitted it first and thus his was rejected. Now he had to get control of himself and think of who had been to the apartment and might have seen the recipe on the desk. There was his free and east going friend Michael, his legal advisor Horatio, Frampton the public school survey taker , and of course his beloved Stella. He and Stella had watched Soap Operas during the visits so he wasn’t really paying attention to what they were doing. That was also when they discovered the dog had fleas and there was a bit of an uproar over that. Now he needed a plan to catch the recipe thief. It only took him an hour to come up with one.

The mini challenge-Good Eating

According to Charlie’s calendar he had three more days to submit a new recipe in the Cajun cooking contest. He put aside his plans for finding the thief and concentrated on his new recipe. The task while difficult could also be boring so he kept thinking of the hundred thousand dollar prize money. This time he swore he would do a better job at keeping secrets. When he finally finished he put a copy of a recipe on the desk and settled down as was his fashion with a nice glass of sangria. He felt it added just a touch of class to his life. He called all his friends to come and celebrate with him. He even invited Frampton. He bragged that this was so much better than the last recipe he had submitted that the thief would now get nothing. He would submit it by post tomorrow. Everybody seemed really happy for him.
They left he waited. The hospital called. It seems Stella was there horribly ill and asking for him.
“Why did it have to be you Stella?” He thought.” I didn’t want it be you. You had to make it and taste it. Now enjoy the fruits of your thievery. It feels so good when a plan comes together.”
Then he put the genuine new recipe in the mail.

Of course the dragons were busy today you can see them HERE.

Just a quick reminder . If you are planning on doing a Portrait of Words they are due Tuesday August 25. You can see the pictures here.

Friday, August 21, 2009

Quiet Crooks

Flash Fiction 55
Friday 55 Flash Fiction is brought to you by G-man (Mr Knowitall). The idea is you write a story in exactly 55 words. If you want to take part pop over and let G-man know when you've posted your 55.Here is today's story:
The Quiet Crooks

They were very, very quiet crooks but they weren't very smart.
They could take all your stuff and never wake you up.
They were quiet. So quiet.
The local newspaper said so.
But soon they got caught.
They were not master minds of crime.
But according to the paper they were Master
Mimes of Crime.


*#*#*#*#*#

Since I discovered it was okay I am writing a second flash 55 which will be a continuous story but a complete story every week. Here then is the eighteenth chapter in the exciting ongoing adventures of Sir Laughsalot and Robberhood
The entire story to date is HERE
The most recent chapters are HERE


Sir Laughsalot left his frog in the stable and hopped up to the castle.
He was hardly laughing.
He wanted his horse back.
It was darn hard riding a frog and certainly not a laughing matter.
He really needed Moreless the somewhat incompetent wizard.
Why can you never find a wizard when you need one.

Of course the dragons were busy today you can see them HERE.

Thursday, August 20, 2009

The Dalton Story -Part Three

It is a Quilly day. Time to take Quilly’s three words for the day and write a story. . Click on the word for a definition: acquiesce; tadpole & viliorate plus two others vellicle and traboccant from my word vault.

The war of traboccant words continued between the Daily Globe and Dalton Soakum. Dalton bought more air time to tell people that he was a good man but the Globe was viliorating his reputation with its constant barrage of lies.
The Globe responded with a two page article in effect saying only the littlest tadpoles would be taken in by the TV adds and Daltons tortiloquy delivered with his usual vultuous face. Dalton’s lawyer demanded that the paper cease and desist in its campaign against his client. A demand the editor of the Globe had no intention to acquiesce to.
All the while this was going on the poor tourist found with the gun in his car was locked up in the local jail, as tight a vellicle as you will find anywhere. His lawyer was screaming false imprisonment and frame-up. He had no history of violence, no motive, and no criminal record of any kind. Further he claimed to be just a montivagant tourist who never, ever had anything like this happen to him before.
The local police chief , as incompetent a fellow as you will find anywhere just wished the whole thing would go away but , of course, it wouldn’t. But then there really was an absolute paucity of evidence for the police to work with. They had the gun that was used to shoot at the editor but as opprobrious as the fact may be it was never registered.So it didn’t really belong to anybody and it had no finger prints on it. Somebody saw a car speeding from the place where the gun was fired in either a green or a blue car. That was the extent of the evidence.

And of course with Quilly's words comes the required quivel.
There is poetry which a few people do well.
Then there is poetic drivel which is more fun and has its own experts.
But below them all is Quivel
Remember to write quivel you must write something that looks like a poem, any style , but is so bad that if it was printed in a book of poetry a true poetic zoilist would tear it out and burn it. What looks like really bad haiku is really qiku where the middle line must always contain a Quilly word

Poor Little Tadpole

The tadpole;in the pool
Being nobody’s fool
Would never acquiesce to be a frog
But keep swimming in the bog
A frog viliorates his good looks
Has things wanted by cooks
With a vellicle upon its legs
Enters into the dregs
Nobody likes a tadpoles traboccant taste
Tadpole parts aren’t left as waste.
But a frog he will become
That’s why he is so glum.

Surrender
acquiesce Now
Never

Little
tadpole
Friend

Ugly
viliorate
How

Of course the dragons were busy today you can see them HERE.

Saturday, August 15, 2009

Raven's Challenge 76

It is Saturday and time to play with words supplied by Raven's Wordzzle
This Week's Ten Word Challenge will be: superlative, flea market, falling leaves, disinformation, who was that masked man?, keeping kids out of trouble, I'm a believer, bonnet in the attic, staff, generation.

For the mini challenge: deep in the forest, government, charming, heirlooms, flabbergasted


The Mega Challenge as
The Ongoing Adventures of Agent 012


Agent 012 arranged to have Phobus Thaw transported to the secret government hideaway located deep in the forest. Then he proceeded to spread official disinformation that Thaw had been killed trying to escape. He now felt certain that Hamlin Moneeee , despite his hired killers and his vast financial empire, could not find him and kill him. “I’m a believer” he told one told the Agency staff members of not leaving any loose ends.
With all that could be done done Agent 012 decided to go home until the research department had finished going over Moneeee’s life with a fine tooth comb. They would pull his bank account records, his telephone records, and open a computer watch on his e-mail. All of that would take time.
Arriving home 012’s wife wanted to go to the Bonnet in the Attic Flea Market because Marge from down the street said they had some superlative items there. In fact some of them might even be heirlooms. 012 didn’t put much trust in what Marge said because though she was charming she was something of a bubble head.
When they got there he was flabbergasted to discover a genuine Lone Ranger lunch box., a real antique. His whole generation had grown up watching the program that ended “who was that masked man?” It was only $3.00 so he bought it. He told his wife he was going to put it on the shelf in the recreation room or as the kids called it the wreck room. The task of keeping kids out of trouble was a lot easier when that lunch box was in use because they had good role models on TV.
When they got home he had an e-mail which said we have a problem with falling leaves. He told his wife that was accountant jargon for some numbers aren’t coming out right and they needed him at the store. In reality it meant that security at the hideaway had been breached and the place was under attack.
When he got to the Agency he discovered two men with machine guns had fired on the cabin. Of course, Thaw was kept in an underground cell so he was safe. One agent had been killed before the new super magnet defense system disarmed the two men. They were now lodged in cells next to Thaw.
The most disturbing thing is that somehow they had found the place. There had to be a leak in the Agency.
Agent 012 just knew this was not going to be his day but he did have the lunch box.

The ten word challenge- Save the Flea Market

The Falling Leaves flea market which was held every October was held to raise money for the Children’s Service Society that worked at keeping kids out of trouble , a truly superlative objective.
So Bonnie McGuire who was a fervid believer in helping kids decided to give Aunt Bessy’s bonnet in the attic to them to sell. “I’m a believer” she said to one of the staff members “and though the bonnet has been in my family for many generations I want you to have it.”
“I’m so glad” the staff member replied, “ Someone has been spreading disinformation about us and this is causing some people to hold back. Blush Limraw has accused us of being communist on his radio show based on those pamphlets. It‘s as if a masked man came and robed our kids and we can’t get an answer to the question ’who was that masked man. How do you confront people you can’t see. “
Bonnie went home and called her brother Bob down at the TV station. Two nights later the TV station did an hour special on the Society with testimonies from some of the kids that they had helped now become adults. One was , even, a Pastor. After that even Limraw backed off. The flea market went well and they raised more money than any other year with people insisting on paying more than the listed price “ to help the kids”. But they never did find out who had put out the pamphlets

The mini challenge-Watch out for Frogs

Charming David Angeeer was flabbergasted that his plan to crush the Falling Leaves flea market had failed. “ I even fooled that idiot Blush Limraw “ he thought, “ and yet I failed” He was determined to make them pay for taking his mother’s heirlooms when she offered them. He knew in his heart they should have been his. First he tried to push various government agencies on them but every investigation showed them to be squeaky clean. Then he tried spreading lies. Now he found himself deep in the forest on his way to the hut where a witch supposedly lived. He was ready to pay he her a huge sum of money to put a curse on the flea market.
She met him at the door and he was surprised to see how beautiful she looked. He had expected an old hag. He explained to her what he wanted and that he would pay generously to have it done.
When he finished his explanation she asked if he would look for some other way to reach his goal if she turned him down. He assured her he would even resort to murder if he had to because they were going to pay.
She shook her head and waved her hand. And that’s how the charming David Angeeer became a charming bull frog.
The Children’s Service Society would appreciate if you refrained from kissing frogs just in case, particularly charming frogs.

Of course the dragons were busy today you can see them HERE.

Friday, August 14, 2009

But She Died

Flash Fiction 55
Friday 55 Flash Fiction is brought to you by G-man (Mr Knowitall). The idea is you write a story in exactly 55 words. If you want to take part pop over and let G-man know when you've posted your 55.Here is today's story:

They saw her fall from the high cliff.
They saw the raging river carry her body away.
Her body was never found but she was dead.
They were so sure they held a beautiful memorial service.

But now he saw her waking on the street.
Certainly that is impossible unless this is
a soap opera.

*******************************
Since I discovered it was okay I am writing a second flash 55 which will be a continuous story but a complete story every week. Here then is the eighteenth chapter in the exciting ongoing adventures of Sir Laughsalot and Robberhood
The entire story to date is HERE
The most recent chapters are HERE
Moreless the Wizard covered him with a protective spell so Sir Laughsalot got on his horse and went to fight the witch.
The witch screamed her spell at him but it had no effect . His horse, however, turned into a large frog.
He cut off her head.
He couldn't ride a frog but he tried.

Of course the dragons were busy today you can see them HERE.

Thursday, August 13, 2009

The Dalton Story

It is a Quilly day. Time to take Quilly’s three words for the day and write a story. . Click on the word for a definition:
tortiloquy; montivagant; & vultuous

The latest headline in the Daily Globe read “ Dalton ( Whiplash) Soakum’s tortiloquy fools nobody.”
In the article that followed they printed his latest speech in full and then ran pictures of the conditions that the tenants lived under to illustrate the lies Dalton was telling.
Dalton bought time on the local television station and with as vultuous a countenance as possible claimed the paper was running a vendetta against him. It did not seem to have much effect.
The police were still trying to discover who shot at the Editor. On an anonymous tip they had stopped a montivagant visitor. Under the back seat of his car they found a gun. Bullets fired from it matched the bullet fired at the editor. It looked like an open and shut case except the man had no motive and claimed not to know how the gun got there.. It was wiped clean of prints which was also strange. There might be more to this case than they first thought.

And of course with Quilly's words comes the required quivel.
There is poetry which a few people do well.
Then there is poetic drivel which is more fun and has its own experts.
But below them all is Quivel
Remember to write quivel you must write something that looks like a poem, any style , but is so bad that if it was printed in a book of poetry a true poetic zoilist would tear it out and burn it. What looks like bad haiku is really qiku where the middle line must always contain a Quilly word.

Truth Not Spoken

The tortiloquy of the congressman
Fooled his followers out of hand
Claimed to be a montivagant sort
Traveled by boat to every port
Climbed every mountain you could name
Was well versed in hunting game
When the truth they began to trace
A vultuous visage was his face
For out of Chicago he’d never been
Not even as far as New Berlin

His truth
political tortiloquy
Your truth

Smokes Camels
Montivagant cowboy
Eats Wheaties

Much loss
Vultuous visage
Then new

Of course the dragons were busy today you can see them HERE.

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

A Biker Story

A Picture Story from Portrait of Words



Geofrey claimed to have been born on a bike.
That was almost the truth. His father had taken his mother to the hospital on a Ariel Red Hunter and almost didn’t make it. But he was born in a hospital. His wife swore he would have brought his bike to bed with him is she would have let him.
Now none of this would be a problem if the Big G had just stayed young. But he didn’t. As he grew old arthritis settled into his knees. This made bike riding very painful for him and somewhat dangerous as well. Any good rider knows you need those knees for control. If he took the medication to dull the pain it made him less alert not a good condition for a rider.
Because of his wife’s fears he went to most places, now, in his red sports car.
It was okay but not as good as the bike. But every Friday, rain or shine he got on the bike and rode down to “ Joe’s Fishin Shack” for the fish fry. It was a ritual, more than that it was his ritual.
His wife begged him to give it up. “We can take the boat out on Friday
and you can catch your own fish”.
She pleaded.” Then. I’ll fry them up for you and you know how good fresh caught fish are when I cook them.”
But he wouldn’t listen. It was his bike and his ritual. He didn’t even waver when she told him that if he sold the bike he could buy that expensive ivory carved temple to complete his collection of ivory carvings.
No! It was his ritual and that was that.
Then came that horrible Friday night . There was a thunder storm and it was raining heavily. but it was Friday and it was his ritual. So off he went . He woke up in the hospital. His bike was ruined. He had a broken arm , cracked ribs and his knees were literally destroyed. It took months of surgery to put him back together. Both knees were replaced and he had pins in his arm but he was ready to come home. They had taught him how to walk again but wonder of wonders there was no pain in his knees.
Now he was home again. His wife took him by the hand and lead him out to the garage there in perfect condition was a 1980 Harley Davidson just like the one destroyed in the accident. It was unbelievable. She knew he loved that bike and had searched long and hard to find one. “There was even enough insurance money left over to get you that ivory temple “ she said.
If he had ever doubted it he knew he had married the right woman.

Saturday, August 08, 2009

Raven's Challenge 75

It is Saturday and time to play with words supplied by Raven's Wordzzle
This Week's Ten Word Challenge will be: reluctant, sacrilege, territory, humiliating, master of ceremonies, gesture, dirty deed, crumbling, thaw, token
For the mini challenge: official portrait, personal bank account, shoulder bone, unbearable, widow


The Mega Challenge as
The Ongoing Adventures of Agent 012


The backup crew from the Agency finally arrived and they brought the equipment Agent 012 asked for. With the reluctant cooperation of the riverboat Captain he set it up in the hallway one had to pass through to get on or off the boat. He inserted the poison dart into the machine and then seated himself behind a desk at the exit end and waited. After what seemed like an unbearable time people began to leave. Agent 012 made small talk with them and told them he was there to spot cheaters then with a token gesture moved them on. Over one hundred people went by and 012 was no closer to catching the dart shooter . But he had scared a number of people who were cheating. The only excitement was when philanthropist Hamlin Moneeee came through. Usually he leaves through a VIP exit and he felt it was humiliating to make him go through the same exit procedures as the rif raf . He demanded to know who was responsible for this sacrilege so they could be made to pay. It seems he was good friends with every political figure in the territory and somebody’s head would roll. Agent 012 looked him in the eye and said “ Your not a cheater so please move on”. Finally at two in the morning it happened. The man who was the Master of Ceremonies for the evening program came through and the red light went on. 012 pushed a button and two agents entered and tried to take the man out. Suddenly he raised his arm and from his shirt sleeve a dart flew into the neck of the Agent. The Agent fell to the floor. 012 reacted by karate chopping the suspects arm breaking his shoulder bone. The arm fell limp and would fire no more darts.
“ So you’re the man who did the dirty deed” 012 said.” Who are you working for? “
“I’ll never talk “ the man said with a sneer.
“Look man! You just killed an Agent of an Agency so secret even the President doesn’t know we exist. If you don’t tell us what we want to know we are simply going to fly you over Lake Michigan and drop you in. Nobody will ever know. Then again we could let his widow , also an Agent use you for target practice. I bet she could make a lot of holes before you die. Tell us what we want to know and we will turn you over to the police and you can take your chances with the Court. ” 012 proclaimed.
One could see the resistance of the killer crumbling as he contemplated his fate
Even while this was happening his fingerprints had uploaded to the Agency. They had determined him to be Phobus Thaw a one-time con man. They had seized and examined his personal bank account records. They even had a copy of his official portrait that was made for the Riverboat Company.
Finally faced with all that they knew about him and what they might do to him Thaw told them he was working for Hamlin Moneeee . I can prove it . I have his private number and if you remember he was in the room when I shot that traitor.
This was turning out to be 012’s Day.

The ten word challenge-The Gold Watch

As a token of appreciation for his years of service the Master of Ceremonies presented Detective Robert Roberts with a gold watch. Robert who had been reluctant to come to the dinner in his honor thanked the department for the kind gesture. He was not at all sure he deserved the watch given his humiliating performance on his last case. He had the crook ,whose dirty deeds were legendary, trapped in the crumbling old building. The shot he fired at him ricocheted off of two walls and hit the Police Chief in the butt. Shooting your own chief was sacrilege . You just didn’t do it.
When the dinner was over he left for the Northern Territory so that he could get there before the ice began to thaw and relax with some ice fishing. He fully intended to put the Chief’s behind behind him and start a new life.

The mini challenge-Condolences

Chief Henry Nokeys posed for his official portrait standing up since the bullet in his behind gave him unbearable pain when he sat down. When he had been shot in the shoulder and the bullet glanced off his shoulder bone it had hurt but nothing like this. He had one more thing he had to do before going to the hospital to get the bullet removed. He had to bring his condolences to Robert Roberts widow. Her husband, a great detective had died while ice fishing and was found frozen in the lake.
Hiring the man who made the accident happen had put a large dent in the Chief’s personal bank account but he couldn’t let somebody who shot him in the butt and caused him such pain walk away with a gold watch. Even as he knocked on the widow’s door he wondered what happened to that watch.

Of course the dragons were busy today you can see them HERE.

Friday, August 07, 2009

Flash 55-Fortune Teller

Flash Fiction 55
Friday 55 Flash Fiction is brought to you by G-man (Mr Knowitall). The idea is you write a story in exactly 55 words. If you want to take part pop over and let G-man know when you've posted your 55.Here is today's story:

Once upon a time there was a very short fortune-teller
who was sent to a very tough prison.
She hated that prison.

So being a very clever person she conned the guard into letting her escape.
She fled to somewhere in Florida and hid there.
Since then she has been a

small medium at large.

_________________________________

Since I discovered it was okay I am writing a second flash 55 which will be a continuous story but a complete story every week. Here then is the seventeenth chapter in the exciting ongoing adventures of Sir Laughsalot and Robberhood
The entire story to date is HERE
The most recent chapters are HERE

Good King Underwear wanted to make a pumpkin pie but the only pumpkin available was the Shining Knight.
Sir Laugsalot found this funny and fell off his chair laughing.He would, however, have protected the pumpkin.
Just in time Moreless, the sometimes court wizard, found the right spell and turned him back to A knight.

Of course the dragons were busy today you can see them HERE.

Thursday, August 06, 2009

Quilly Words-Brave Editor

It is a Quilly day. Time to take Quilly’s three words for the day and write a story. . Click on the word for a definition:
rogitate; solipsistic; & nequient

The Brave Editor
The banner headline of The Daily Globe read “ When will Dalton ( Whiplash) Soakum put aside his solipsistic attitude and begin treating his tenants as people?” It had been the banner headline seven days in a row and the same question was repeated word for word,at least four times, in the article following .
Finally Dalton marched into the editorial office of the Globe and demanded to know if the question had been rogiated enough times yet.
When would they stop persecuting him.
The editor explained they had more than enough information for at least another eight weeks and all of it was verified and checked by the paper’s staff of lawyers.
They would , of course, stop running the articles when the suggested improvements were made to the various properties. The paper was afraid , however, that Dalton is nequient in the art of compromise which is required for the changes to happen.
Dalton left threatening law suits of all kinds and making physical threats to the person of the editor.
The editor was not afraid as he knew the paper’s lawyers were the best in town and that when it came to fighting Dalton was nequient in that art as well.
What he was not prepared for was the bullet that smashed through his car window just missing his head. He assumed it had been fired by Dalton but would he be able to prove it? Only time would tell.
But the rogitation would continue, of that he was sure.

And of course with Quilly's words comes the required quivel.
There is poetry which a few people do well.
Then there is poetic drivel which is more fun and has its own experts.
But below them all is Quivel
Remember to write quivel you must write something that looks like a poem, any style , but is so bad that if it was printed in a book of poetry a true poetic zoilist would tear it out and burn it. What looks like bad haiku is really qiku where the middle line must always contain a Quilly word.


His Hell

Solipsistic ideas served him well
As he worked his way to hell
Nequient of the caring arts
His success off the charts
His friends died alone
No love ever shown
His hell was to hear them cry
With the rogitated question why.
From now until eternity
That was his penalty.


Who?
Rogitate
Why?

Me first
Solipsistic
You last

Dumb
Nequient
Deficient

Of course the dragons were busy today you can see them HERE.

Saturday, August 01, 2009

Raven's Challenge 74

It is Saturday and time to play with words supplied by Raven's Wordzzle
This Week's Ten Word Challenge will be: fair warning, hormones, journalism, philanthropist, burgeoning, running the bulls, saturation, tossed in the towel, whine, indelicate details
And for the mini: hard labor, lurid, quick fix, sizable contributions, trumpet

The Mega Challenge as
The Ongoing Adventures of Agent 012

Agent 012 was not one to whine but he had a sizable list of complaints to give to the Agency about its lack of support on this mission . He was running the burgeoning list through his head when he accidentally knocked over his drink and he hadn’t had a single sip. Here he was on a riverboat talking to a potential suspect in the attempted oil refinery bombing when he did such a stupid thing.
“ How did you know” the man asked looking with horror at the drink.” How did you know?”
Agent 012 who just a few moments ago almost tossed in the towel on this one as a suspect now responded like a journalism major to a lead. “ We’ve known about you for some time and I’m giving you fair warning that if you don’t tell us who gave the orders you will just disappear” he said. “Then when the lab is through with you we fly you to Spain where you will be thrown in with a raging bull . Your body will be dumped on the street during the running the bulls celebration. You will be just another tragedy of a stupid tradition”
“I didn’t want to do it but this guy forced me to. He knew all about an incident when my hormones got the best of me and my wife was visiting her mother. He threatened to tell my wife all the lurid indelicate details if I didn’t cooperate. His name was ...” He stopped in mid speech and fell forward.
A quick examination showed a poison dart in his neck. Somebody didn’t want his talking. The question is who.
This had to be the day the great philanthropist Hamlin Moneeee, known for his sizable contributions to just about everything was onboard .His being there had been trumpeted for days in advance and had lead to a saturation crowd on this day. Any one of them could have fired the dart. Agent 012 knew there would be no quick fix to this problem. What was ahead for him was plain old hard labor of the detective kind. Where were the extra agents he was promised ?
He didn’t think this was going to be his day.

The ten word challenge-Just Bull

Joe’s running the bulls to keep them fit was always preceded by fair warning to the other farm hands and the hanging of the red banner with a bull in the center.
There was a time he didn’t run the bulls but that was before PAPO ( Picky Animal People Organization) whined to that journalism class. The stories that followed contained lots of indelicate details on how the poor bulls were treated causing their hormones to get out of control. Most of what was said , of course, was not true but how do you fight such a burgeoning saturation of articles? So he tossed in the towel and agreed to PAPO’s demands. One of which was running the bulls at least twice a week.
On the day in question philanthropist Hamlin Moneeee one of the largest contributors to PAPO decided to check things out for himself. He was cutting across the field when the running the bulls began. They ran over him. The funeral will be held Tuesday and the law suits will be filed the following week.
Hamlin was told to stay out of the field but you know PAPO.


The mini challenge-Fixing the Band

The band director hoped that the new and sizable contributions to the band along with some hard labor would bring a quick fix to the band’s problems. They had lived down the stories of the actions of their lurid trumpet player who was now history. It was the sound they needed to work on and new instruments would help considerably in that area. The new outfits would add to their self esteem and all that was left was to practice, practice, practice. Their very first concert after the change would feature a marvelous new piece of music called “ Save the Bulls”. The concert would be dedicated to the memory of Hamlin Moneee who had made it all possible.

Of course the dragons were busy today you can see them HERE.